You would not believe the amount of HTML that I had to get rid of to make the post below work!

Achieving

There are many things I have accomplished in life, the big things, like completing my degree, learning to drive and becoming a full-time youth worker and the small things, beating my own score on various facebook games, meeting deadlines and building flat packs.

There are now four things in my room that I have built using instructions, and whilst I am no enthusiast, it gives me some sense of joy that I can build something and it ends up looking like the picture in front of me. So now I have a picture shelf (which used to hold books), a bed (with help from my Dad) and two DVD/CD cases. (Once upon a time there was a floating shelf on the cards, but since they can’t hold anything substantial, that idea was put away.) I am a little proud of myself, because this is the first time that I’ve done something like this entirely on my own.

My Dad is always saying that Ikea is rubbish and that you shouldn’t ever buy furniture from a shop the other side of the channel, but if it’s the only place that sells what I want in white, I haven’t really got a choice!!

Anyway, the time spent was good, I got to use my brain cells (though the instructions weren’t hard) and my muscle! And now I have a wall for storage! Ta da!

The only thing that I’ve really got to figure out is how to attach them to the wall, so they don’t fall on me and potentially break my legs whilst I slept. Hopefully everything will fit in these two wonderful inventions and I’ll be able to use the spare under bed space for shoes! Now I’ve just got to fix my overflowing chest of draws... that’s for a day when I feel like tidying!

In other news, it seems that the addition of yellow lines to the estate, has psychologically altered the minds of everyone who parks in the surrounding area. Now they all seem to think that parking on the pavement and the road is ok...when in fact is more dangerous and illegal!

Case in point – the parking of the fitter who came to change the fan that got killed by my Mum leaving the sausages cooking for far too long! (the cooker and fan were brought from Galleywood kitchens – the fan stopped the house from burning down) This is happening every day and it’s rather annoying. To be honest though, since I watched the yellow lines go down, I haven’t seen a traffic warden... And there is still a gap in the double yellows on Hillhouse Drive, where all the ridiculousness started!

Now is the beginning of another four month review period for me, the last one ended well, with some really clear, constructive feedback from my management, plus a thank you and a well done! The next four months are going to be interesting... hopefully with an update of the last four to start off with and a move forwards to building relationships with team, young people and schools. I’m really excited about some training that I’ve got to look out for, all of it will hopefully make me more proficient for my job!

Keep an eye out for the return of the Summer Party in the near future!!

P.S. I have migrated to the floor, because the wireless internet connection only works down here, I swear my computer always askes itsself 'How uncomfortable can I make Liz's day today?'

Wedding Daze

I'm in the middle of two days of wedding prep for Mandy and Rob. Yesterday was dress shopping and today is the engagement party.

I'm not allowed to give you any details about yesterday... not even a hint about dresses or colours... we had a great day and I think the bridal party are going to be a force to be reckoned with in the year to come!

Today we're celebrating a year to the day with an engagement party. It should be really good fun, we've been looking forward to it for a long time!

Mandy and Rob are a brilliant couple, not only because Mandy is my best friend and I've known Rob since I was 11, they work really well together and I always enjoy their company.

The only person that is missing tonight is the best man...he's working hard for Disney!

On with the day, Karen should be arriving soon and I need to get ready to spend some time with her and Heather!

Weekend of Ultimate Funsies! EVER! In the whole actual world! YES!

A little over the top you might say, but not really when you consider that I spent a whole weekend in Elveden Forest at Center Parcs with a group of20 somethings who don't get away very often on holiday!

4 days and 3 nights of laughter and making firm friends. We did a lot of walking (cycling is expensive) and a lot of eating, swimming and sunbathing. I spent a lot of time with Karen


Here she is BBQ-ing on the Sunday night, having also cooked on the Saturday. We managed to feed 11 of us successfully at three different time over the weekend with limited space in the kitchen and a heat detector/smoke alarm that just would not shut up!

I learnt a couple of exercises to ensure that I strengthen my muscles in my lower back and stomach (if you've ever zipped up your stomach muscles and had to stand in a neutral spinal position you'll know exactly what I'm on about!) and spent time relaxing in the purpose built spa!

Unfortunately there aren't a wealth of photos, simple because my brain took a long time to get into holiday mode!

Fun all around and possibly a visit next year, if we're lucky!

Easter

This Easter weekend has gone by in a flash, partly because I haven't been able to sit a watch really.

Maundy Thursday was really important this year. We had some good discussions and a little bit of teaching about the first passover, sharing food and sitting together (which I don't think we've done before) ... and the time in church was equally important. We were sat with the young people from the team church across town. It was great to sit with them and listen to what they'd been up to.

Warner spoke about the first passover again and used material from the time when students from St John's school came to church to learn about passover.

Shortly after that a few of us gathered at St Mary's in the High Street to hold a vigil. I had two hours of nothing, to recover and pray.


It was nice to sit and chill... to listen to God and hear words that I've heard over and over again, but with a fresh set of thoughts

"What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes."

Matt 6 from the Message (and biblegateway.com)

God will provide for us if we look to Him first... obvious really, but fixation on God is the key. often we use this passage as a 'don't worry God will fix it', kind of a 'while we're in the midst of trouble' verse ... but actually it's a verse to remind us where our focus should be inn the first place.

Mini but important...

So Good Friday crept up me. I said the words that Jesus would've said to Pilot and then rushed home to then rush out again to join this

The CTB Walk of Witness. It's two years since I last described it (here) which means I was working in Bristol at the time of blogging (time flies). We almost managed total silence and those businesses that have sprung up since Easter of last year were more than curious to see what was going on (a really clear memory of a hairdresser almost running to her door to see this spectacle is in my mind). No heckling this year, a couple of rude motorists though.

The rest of Good Friday was for Eastingle. We had 85 people in our church, learning what Easter is all about, and realising that I still don't know why the day is called Good. It was a really good afternoon, despite the rain.

The rest of the weekend was taken up with travelling to and from Bristol. It was good to see Kay, and her brother, who both turned 25 last weekend! And to collect and be driven round in Kay's new MX-5! I also saw a very dear friend, on my way home, I haven't seen Mary since I lived in Bristol, even though we used to live a street (or so) apart from each other in Billericay. She's now in Sussex, it was nice to catch up with her and meet her crazy dog, Horlicks!

Sunday came, unusual from previous years, I can't put my finger on it though, but it may have something to do with not seeing Karen, at all over Easter, and I slept for the most part (travelling 300 miles in 24 hours) and then headed to the pub. We were in the Spoons in town and bumped into the other lot from Billericay that are going to Center Parcs this weekend. I also had the opportunity to try Daffy's Elixir from Brewsters. Lovely beer - going to see if I can find it in bottle for soon!

Anyway, it is Thursday, I now feel I need to post this, because the time stamp is incorrect!

Eastingle

I said it last week, that before I even thought about it, Maundy Thursday and Good Friday will be upon us and Sunday would be rushing up.

Well here it is. Holy week is about to over take my life.

After my posts last week, I got myself involved in Eastingle preparations. Which is not more than I can handle, but something I believe is important for the life of the church and the community, though it makes me crazy busy for a bit!

You're probably wondering what Eastingle is...

Well, it's the follow on from Christingle, which is the celebration of the light coming into the world and banishing the darkness.

For the last couple of years, we've had three Christingle services, we get, on average, 500 people through our doors on Christmas Eve, because of this very special service, which involves an orange, a candle and some sweets.

People started to notice that last year we weren't doing any follow up services - Jesus wasn't a baby for very long (Talledaga Nights!), He grew up. Not a lot of people know what Easter is about, which is strange to me because it is up there in importance with Christmas.

So Eastingle involves a hot cross bun, 3 ribbons (purple, red and white) and a straw.

The Straw goes in the hot cross bun and the ribbons go on the straw in this order

Purple - To signify the ministry of Jesus and His triumphal entry into Jerusalem as the king of the Jews.

Red - To signify the death of Jesus, God's only Son, God as Human form.

White - To signify the fact that when we say sorry God forgets the things we do wrong and we're 'clean' through the sacrifice of Jesus.

Just writing it is pretty powerful. We've got readings to fill in the 'gaps' and a specially written version of Give me Joy in my Heart (Sing Hosanna) as well as Colours Of Day to sing through the service.

We're also using Tim Hughes version of See His Love, with a power point presentation to match as a time for response.

It's still in the early stages of development as a service plan, but we hope that it is something that will happen every year, and we're gathering together all the information about how we've done it and what resources we've used so that we can help others reach out to their community during our festival time. I'll post some photos when the event has happened.

It's also time to remember our roots too. Tonight we are sharing a meal and remembering the last supper, which has it's roots in the Jewish Passover. I do love tradition, especially when it goes back further than I can get my head around (I'm sure I've said that before!).

Time to go out and gather some food!

You know you're getting old when....

...You go to a family party to celebrate the 18th birthday of someone who you still think should be 15!

Adam, who is referred to, quite rightly, as the youngest cousin, on my Dad's side of the family, turns 18 today, but for family tradition, we always celebrate occassions such as this on a Sunday afternoon/evening. So yesterday, we piled over to Hadleigh to wish him many happy returns and pull out al the old stories, of when we were children and life didn't include mortages, exams and university choices. It makes us happy for a brief moment (and especially happy to note that the eldest of us will be turning 30 in the next three years!) and then we go back to real life... The family bubble is amazing, we can go from opening our doors to loads of boys, to having a roast on a Thursday lunch time, to gently (though sometimes it hits below the belt) humouring each other over food and beer (and this time cake!)

Here's the whipper snapper of the group

That's 'Happy Birthday' in lights for those of you who are struggling with my photo taking abilities (they were brought with the thought that at Christmas he was dressed like a Christmas tree!). His girlfriend is sat next to him.

And this is the cake that helped us to celebrate in the only way we know how (eating lots and singing really loudly!)


That cake topper has glasses, black hair, a black outfit and the coolest drawing of a skull and cross bones I've seen for a very long time! It was created in foam by my Aunt's colleague (who isn't a profession cake maker, but a teacher). The comptuer has a mouse and a key board, plus all the wires you need! It's not edible, but still, I love it!

So Happy 18th Birthday Adam! Enjoy it and we'll see you in the pub some time soon!

Believing the impossible

For the last couple of posts I've been talking about being in our local secondary school, participating and leading lessons for year 7's and 8's (that's anyone aged 11-13, if you don't understand our schooling system!). The year seven groups have heard all about church from a Christian perspective (I can't do it any other way!) and the year eights have had the horror of crucifixion (believe me, it's not very nice to hear the description every day, I haven't got used to it yet and I hope I never do!).

I wanted to call this post 'Celebrating the Ordinary' but I think that what we've come across in the last three weeks has been extraordinary, the students we've spoken to, taught and listened to have all been interested in church and Jesus, His life, His ministry. Which for me is amazing, we don't know their backgrounds, but you can be certain that some of them have parents who have never set foot inside a church. I have been astonished by the wealth of knowledge that we have come across, and I hope that they all remember it for a very long time!

(Of course, we have our funny stories - one boy when asked the difference between real bunnies and the Easter bunny said that Easter bunnies lay chocolate eggs - a highlight of the time we've spent in school!)

The year seven's are doing a church project, they have to visit a local church and build up a report of it, and present it. It's a big part of year 7 R.S. and being one of the closest churches to Mayflower School, we end up getting a few young people through our doors. It's a great idea and it gives me a chance to talk about a building I grew up in, and this week I spotted this


(I love that I have a 5 megapixel camera with me all of the time)

Some pretty cool shots of the church I know so well and I have the privilage of working in.

These images are really key right now, particularly the one of the cross and the banner. We're heading quickly into Holy Week and before you know it, Maundy Thursday and Good Friday will be upon us... but Sunday is a'coming.

This time last year, I was scared, I didn't know where I was going, what I was doing, but this Easter, I'm excited, full of passion for what I believe to be true, the saving grace that has brought me this far, and the ability to put it into words and share the truth of Easter with those I care about the most. To speak about a history that stretches beyond my imagination and to help others catch a glimpse of what it means to be a Christian with a rich tradition, after all Jesus was a Jew!

I've been reminded this week as well that the Trinity will deal with doubters, God will arrive and say

"Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me." Job 40:7

Jesus will appear and say to those who are unsure

"Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe." John 20:27

And the Holy Spirit will turn up and speak to those in their own language, so that they will believe. (The whole of Acts)

The one thing that made me chuckle is that the Thomas story appears in John, and if you know anything about John the writer, you'll know he's a little self centred at times. (Don't believe me? Read John 20: 3-9) Just made me laugh that he's a little 'I can point the finger, because I'm so great'.

Any way... pretty powerful ideas, it's for us to love the doubters, to listen to their worries, their theories, but believe that God will show up in a big way to change their lives.

Getting the sniffles

As always, whenever there is something hugely important going on, I get ill. I get run down, panicked and generally a little ditsy through stress (so apologies if I don't spell check this entry). I can feel myself right now, heating up a little, but I've got cold feet and cold hands, perhaps time to take a couple of cold and flu tablets, to keep my temperature down.

The hugely important thing? I know I've already mentioned it, but I'll say it again, we're in school, doing lessons this week. I do love it, though I am hugely out of practice and know I can't do it without God's power and words. And you know how I know this....

“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

I've been reading in my Bible notes that we're all given talents, we all have to work at them, but in the end God knows how He wants us to use them (and more importantly when), so we have to step back and say to God 'I can't do this, but I know you can'.

(I use Mettle Bible Reading Notes from YFC, which are aimed at 14-18 year olds, and you may think that is odd, but I haven't come across anything that is specifically written for 20 somethings, that isn't full of patronising stories, some times it works, other times it doesn't, but I still get a structured way of reading the Bible and by the time I'm at a point where I can write bible notes, I'll be patronising to everyone who is 20 something!)

I've stepped back a lot over this month and said 'God you do this, I can't', and I've seen some amazing, mind blowing results.

Last night, we had a full youth group, but only four staff members - that's 16 young people (and one dog), to four adults - normally, we wouldn't open with less than 5 people, but we did, and it was a brilliant night, there weren't any major incidents and despite the change of layout, everyone was fine. I definitely felt God's presence falling on the building. One of our staff members is ill at the moment and he told me that a mix up had occurred a couple of weeks ago and the doctor had told him that he's not as unwell as we first feared. I felt a huge sense of relief and thanks that his treatment could go ahead.

Now we're praying for leaders, we're in desperate need of people to help out on Thursday evenings.

This morning I was at an assembly for the school where my boss is chaplain. It was really good to see him speak and pray over a school that is so close to our church.

Keep praying with us, keep asking God to protect us, at school, at youth group, as full time and part time workers.

Celebrations

Yesterday evening we travelled to Quendon Hall (just outside Ugley - tee hee!) to celebrate the marriage of Laura and Kevin.


That's Me, Laura, Kevin, Mandy and Rob in the Drawing Room when we arrived. Laura was soon whisked away to say goodbye to people. It was a wonderful evening, we shared a dance floor and food (very good). So glad to be invited and although none of us were at the ceremony, we were happy to celebrate with drinks and smiles. I know that this is a good and strong relationship, and we're praying for them both as they start living together!

The other reason I'm celebrating is because we're (Schools Ministry Billericay) in Mayflower School for the next two weeks. So far (and I've only done three lessons) we've had a positive response from everyone and loads of questions from students and teachers. We know that our profile is going to be raised and we pray that what we teach sinks in!

Speaking Out

Once again Bible passages are speaking to me left, right and centre!

I've been reminded recently that

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.

which is from Psalm 23 - the writer is talking to God thanking Him for the protection and shelter that He provides - yet in the midst of that, there's this verse, verse 5, which cuts right to the core. My take on it, after being told that I needed to read it after a particularly hard day, where it seemed that everything had gone wrong and everyone was against me, is that God has spent a lot of time finding the right food, the right bits of information for me and has created a feast in front of the people who hate me the most, those who would like to trip me up, get me angry, upset me. I know that I can be full, when my enemies are starving, if I lean on the Lord, if I trust in Him with all of my heart. I have a really big picture in my head of a table full of food, and with Easter approaching, it's quickly turning into a Passover meal. There's also another element, God has prepared a safe place for me, a feast is rarely laid out where scavengers can get to it, so I don't have to keep looking over my shoulder to protect myself and I can lay down and enjoy it. I think I'm always going to go back to this when I come across really tough situation.

The other passage that has hit me square between the eyes is

Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!

Romans 12:16

I knew that 'live in harmony' was a big thing, and I know it's all about forgiveness and listening to each other, and I try my hardest to, its the next two sentences that made me sit up and listen. A stark reminder that although I know that God loves me and sent His own Son to die for me, I certainly shouldn't act like I've got one-up on everyone nor do I know the whole history of the world and whats to come. I guess though, that the same goes for people who aren't Christian... I think the world would be a better place if some of us learnt that we need to keep find out things and that we're not top of the pile.

The fact that I'm surprised by the verses I've mentioned is a reminder to me that I'm in serious need of some learning!

The end is in sight

For the painters of the lines

The rest of the road has been finished, its just the space underneat* the two cars that have sneakily parked in the road. And by sneakily, I mean, they still didn't put out cones or anything... at the moment though, there are still no restriction signs anywhere to help motorists fathom why the lines have been put down.

I will say it over and over... thinking before acting is a tried and tested method of getting success.

*No not a spelling mistake but a link to a great website!

Oh the evidence

Following on from my last post I have the evidence... it's damning, shameful and yes, ridiculous...



Taken this morning, while I was still in my car as you can tell from the bonnet and windscreen wiper in the picture, but you can just see the 'dashes' of double yellow lines... not that I've seen any notice of the restrictions or what the restrictions actually are. I'm sure I'll find out on Monday. The question still remains though... why, when the road is most definitely going to be empty, haven't the line painters closed the road, and finished the job? Is it safer to paint lines between cars?

I know, I just know that as I drive to work tomorrow, I'm going to see cars parked in the 'empty' spaces. And of course, how are they going to police this restriction?

I've asked the question many a time and have never had a satisfactory answer... I've seen people parked outside school when they absolutely should be penalised - for dangerous, on the kerb parking, and there haven't been any traffic wardens around to issue penalties.

Enough... I promise my next post won't be so ridiculous.

Oh the ridiculousness!

Of the council mainly.... I've been driving around Billericay now for 8 and a half months and I don't think I've ever seen the stupid things that I've seen today. Maybe it is just because I have to concentrate on what is happening now that I spot the strange idiosyncrasies of people who are working for the council by default.

Line painting is my example. We've all seen/heard the stories of people having their cars painted with yellow lines or been given tickets because the traffic warden (or whatever the PC term is for them...I'm not particularly bothered at this time of night) has come round whilst the paint is still wet, and the uproar that it can cause. I get that the lines need to be painted, but really, painting between the cars? I'm partly tempted to go back to the spot where I've seen this an take a photo to show you... in fact if it's still like that on Sunday night I will.

It is stupid, a little fore thought would flag up that the cars are going to be parked there, day in day out, normally during working (or commuting) hours and that they will be removed shortly after 6pm or 7pm. After that time, work can commence or the cones can come out ready for painting the next day... simples (as Aleksandr would put it) but no.

Then there's the guy painting the lines with the road still open... on the estate where I live, it's not to hard to redirect the traffic and not a huge amount of people are going to be annoyed if you divert them for a very good reason. I don't want the person painting the line to get knocked over... as morbid as that sounds, it probably does happen. So shut the road of 5 mins and do it safely!

And finally... would it kill you to pull your trousers up whilst you're the face (arse) of the council? I mean literally of course, because the last thing I need on a Friday morning is to see that!

Expectant

The past couple of days I've felt like I'm actually being prepared to do something, to understand something that's coming my way.

For a couple of months I have been slowly coming back to reading the bible everyday, and for the last couple of days the readings and what I've been hearing through other people have been really interesting.

The CGi Women's Conference on Saturday was really powerful, I really like being able to be honest with other people who are in the same situation, who have a few extra years wisdom and can give appropriate advice.

The speakers all had something really important to say... right now I can't remember their names, but there was a lady from Cherish Uganda, who spoke about the work of the Holy Spirit in the village where she runs a community project. She was really aware of the presence of evil - like it was lurking... I've never heard someone describe evil in the way she did. It's really scary, I don't think of evil as lurking, I know something isn't quite right but from evil to be 'hiding behind a bush or something' sends chills down my spine.

We heard from the first black female Baptist president, who talked about King David and the transition of kings from Saul to David, where the community knew that the Lord had left Saul and moved to David, as soon as that happened the loyalty of the armies switched and so did the loyalty of Saul's own sons... if that's what God's power does, then I never want God to leave me.

During the afternoon stream we heard from the lead pastor at CGi Orkney, who used Titanic - a long 13 minute clip of the 3 hour movie - to describe how the church needs to get out of the cruise ship (because it eventually will sink), into the lifeboats and then looking for the lost, going back to those floating in the sea.

It was a great day, some really good times for worship. The rest of the week has been strange. I've had visions and my bible reading this morning was all about history... a whole passage dedicated to the fore fathers and prophets of the Old Testament, my vision was of a rug being woven, that although you can see the detail up close, you have to step away and see the whole pattern to appreciate the beauty of it. At the moment, I know I'm looking really closely at it... And I think I need to step back a bit. Or maybe something is going to be revealed to me soon. Hebrews 11 is a great reminder that as a Christian I've got a huge history of wisdom to draw on and a faith that is centuries old.

I don't know, but I'm excited that God has a plan for me and He's starting to give me little bits of the bigger picture.

It's only Fair...

It's only fair that during fair trade fortnight we should allow our community to try Fair Trade products... so that's what we've been doing... sharing chocolate, cookies, tea and coffee for free.

So heads up... here's a plate of chocolate to make you hungry/wish you'd never visited my blog/wish you lived in Billericay...


And it's all FREE! We've had a great response from the people coming home from school, some who just want chocolate, others who have stuck around to find out a bit more.

So why not buy some fair trade goods or a banana and be part of Go bananas!

Raising awareness

My sister is doing some fun-draising in her parish, all the details are there in the link...

I'm raising funds in a different way... by raising awareness of several different things this week. Firstly it's fair trade fortnight... so we're holding a couple of cafes at Christ Church and taking part in Go Bananas this Friday... I'm going to have bananas coming out of my ears by the end of the day... but it's all part of your five a day... so give it a go, help a worthy cause, and be part of a world record attempt by registering your group/office/family at Go Bananas!

Secondly, I've been raising awareness for the another group young people I'm working with in Chelmsford. If you've never heard of Envision, it's worth taking a look, by clicking on the link. This year, our project is all about sustainability in the community, creating a recipe book with quick and easy meals, so that during this time of economic downturn, people can find affordable ways of feeding their families. They are Boswell and they are really proud of what they are doing!

So I'm shooting off to Chelmsford to see how the project is going and then coming back to Billericay to work with the fair trade cafe!

Spring Has Sprung

Today has been lovely and sunny out, not really warm, but warm enough to forgo a coat for short walks. I stepped out the house and was greeted by a wonderful part of God's creation


Flowers... lovely sun yellow! I don't know what they are, but I remember thinking last week that nothing was going to grow in the space that was left and just looked like dead ground. Therefore I hadn't really paid attention to it, until now!

A nice little reminder that God had a great time creating a world for us that makes us smile.

Finding the forgotten...

Isn't it wonderful when you find something you've forgotten about totally?

I have just rediscovered the Metro Blog list, which I submitted an entry to years ago and obviously they never used my email for anything else. So the tracker that I have threw up a link I'd never seen before and lead me here. Quite exciting really. I don't know how much the person who clicked on the link read, but at least they were drawn in enough to have a go, even if the description is a little out of date.

Talking of finding something exciting... I went back in time recently to rediscover the Soul Survivor church. I've been a couple of times, but normally for conferences or with young people. This time was for a new venture, a new congregation and because it was half term I had some time to take for myself.

It was a good evening... Mike Palivachi, one of the main pastors, spoke on the parable of the Prodigal Son and made some good points, all interesting, he does speak for a long time. The worship was good, lovely Ben Cantelon lead, but the band were in the center and everyone was around the outside. That made it very difficult for me to concentrate on God, because I was conscious of people looking at me... I love singing so much, but when people are looking at me I shrink. Eventually though I got used to it.

Soul Survivor is a good church and a good organisation. It's probably a little too far to go for a regular church service, but still, it's the sort of thing I would attend again.

The one shocking thing (though I suppose it shouldn't really be any more) is the ratio of men to women. At a guess the ratio was probably 4:1 or 3:1 (women to men) which is high, but not unusual. When I was younger I'm sure most events were 1:1 - boys and girls evenly matched in number and I can't understand where it went wrong. I don't know if Soul Survivor is unique in this, but as a person who is surrounded by weddings and relationships, I can't help but notice the inbalance (and it seemed that all the men there either has girlfriends or were married).

Anyone else noticed the same?

Fits and Starts

Original post written very early this morning...

I'm currently word processing this blog entry because my laptop simply refuses to connect to the internet, in the wireless fashion that has revolutionised the way we use our computers, mine has a mind of it's own and as soon as I start to do something useful with my internet, it dies. There is no rhyme or reason, and as described above, it comes in fits and starts, lulls me into a false sense of security and then quickly – without any hint that it's going to disappear – the wireless connection drops dead.

I thought as soon as the house had calmed down, people had stopped moving around and the laptop was in a 'hotspot', as my Dad calls it, the internet would remain accessible for as long as I needed it... but no.

Anyway, what I want to really say has be prompted by The Brits (or The Brit Awards) and Take That (as well as a bible passage – but that's afterwards!).

The Brits, a celebration of music, funnily enough, from British bands and the occasional international band/artist. All great music (mostly – I still don't rate The Ting Tings or Amy Whiney much) and normally a live performance from some of the winners. This year, Duffy scored big time, as did Kings Of Leon. I'd tell you what they won, but I haven't got an internet browser up that works and I haven't been listening to the radio all day, like I used to, nor did I sit in front of the TV last night, voting my heart our and making careful notes! Anyway, Duffy performed live (that girl needs to sort out her intonation), so did Girls Aloud (live vocals to a backing track) and various other bands (I think KOL are in there as well as The Pet Shop Boys), I know I've missed some out, but I only skipped over them all to see Take That... and oh boy was I disappointed... I don't know what their excuse is, but Gary and the boys (or Mark and the boys as Sara Cox calls them) decided to mime 'The Greatest Day'. So so sad... I was looking forward to hearing their real voices.

I have been thinking about Live music and concerts for a long time, I'm a big fan of Radio 1's Live Lounge and I absolutely love hearing an artist to something really funny/amazing to their own or someone else's songs. Dizzee Rascal changing The Ting Tings (yes I know I've just slated them, rude boi) or Maroon 5 totally acoustic (what a voice Mr. Levine). I also love it when an old classic is turned into something completely different – think Take That on their come back tour...

So why mime? One of the biggest group around and they mime. Here's hoping they've got something extra up their sleeves for the summer. After all, you pay so much money for a show, and if the band ends up playing exactly what is on their latest album, what does that prove? It steals a personal identity from the members of the band who create that sound... sticks them in a box with the rest of the 'gigs to forget'. This year, I'm hoping Girls Aloud, Boyzone and Take That deliver something really special at each of their concerts.

Ok, so having half term means I spend a lot of time reading and studying. Yesterday I opened my bible notes after having several conversations with different female friend about worries and God gave me this

'Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you'

The whole passage is 1 Peter 5:6-11. The whole passage is full of advice, the whole book is. It was written for Christians who lived in a pagan society (sound familiar?) and were struggling with keeping their faith. Definitely would encourage you to read it in a day, its really easy, there's not a lot of text, but it will take time to sink in.

I don't think I have many worries at the moment, I'm not stressed out by much... but I know people who are. I know people who are really struggling with decisions at the moment and I've got to give them to God firstly, pray for them, for God to work with them and look after them before I do. Difficult, but worth it.

Lots of my prayers have been answered really blatantly recently, leaders have turned up when we've needed them, weather has cleared so I could travel, I'm grateful for all of these and in hindsight I can praise God for the things He gives us instantly. A good couple of eye openers bringing me back to trust and love.