Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Is honesty the best policy?

Several things I have read, written and spoken about in the past have often been said with real honesty, but in life honesty hurts.

I am fortunate that I have parents and grandparents who have taught me that honesty is a positive thing, something to learn from and that lying is discouraged. In that way a lie is caught out quickly and the conversation moves on.

Recently I have been thinking about the best way to share your honest opinion about something that your feel strongly about. Politicians, church leaders and others in prominent positions have been applauded for their honest opinion though sometimes, it has backfired completely. Through social media, you can be quick to share your opinion, often without a second thought about how it affects your friends/followers. Even in a well thought out document, the opinion of some has not sat well with society. There is honesty that is meant to provoke, people that decide controversy is the only way to be heard.

There is also honesty that is affirming and gathers a group of friends together in a common opinion. When that happens, when you agree to agree, love is easier.

Thinking about Biblical honesty, we've been set up to lie from the Fall - Adam and Eve were unable to hold their hands up and say 'it was me' when God asked. And thinking about Jesus, his honesty was measured, weighed and said - it hurt the religious leaders of the time, but he shows the truth through his actions.

We can see that honesty comes from feelings - frustration, pain, happiness, etc. Jesus is honest when he is asked a question, so following his example, I should be honest every time someone asks me question and talks to me, but I should also be considerate as I give my answers. Though sometimes, my hurt, pain, resentment, anger has gotten in the way of me answering graciously. I apologise for that, I have no excuses, I am responsible for my own actions, I am sorry if you know me and you have been hurt by my brutal honesty.

So is honesty the best policy? Yes, but a measured response is the way to go about it. It could save you a lot of hurt in the long run if you answer someone graciously, with God's heart, with love and with open-mindedness. Sometimes though, it does hurt and when it does, when it takes so much out of you that you feel like you need to give up and give in, that is the time to be considerate again, look at what you have said, how you felt and how to move on.

God's honesty translates into fierce love, He wants those that He has called to know He is in charge. It translates into a long journey of discovery and the chance over and over to say sorry, wipe the slate clean and work out what next.

I'm still figuring it out. I am far from perfect, far from understanding what is the best way to respond to what I have been told in most cases. How to be honest gracefully is hard to do, but with God's help, anything is possible!

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